Trailer Trash Redneck Jokes And Politics

This was recently sent to me and is definitely worth sharing –Thankyou Mom!

WOULDN’T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
” My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world’s nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT’ll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hellholes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at ho me . On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China .
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , Germany , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. “Bon ne chance, me z a mies.”
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don’t care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes , Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2 its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra thousand tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put ‘em? Yep, border security!!
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we’ll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country’s oil needs for decades to come. If you’re an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, ‘darn tootin.’
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe yo u and we won’t forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America . Thank you and good night. ”
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier.

How To Use Your IRS Rebate Check:
As you may have heard, the Bush Administration said each of us would get a rebate check to stimulate the economy.

* If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China .
* If we spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
* If we purchase a computer it will go to India.
* If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and/or Guatemala.
* If we purchase a “good” car it will go to Japan.
* If we purchase “useless crap” it will go to Taiwan ~~
* None of it will help the American economy~~!

We need to keep that money here in America . The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it at YARD SALES, since those are the only businesses still in the US

 THE WINDFALL TAX

Adding a tax to your retirement is simply another way of saying to the

American people, you’re so stupid that we’re going to keep doing this until

we drain every cent from you. That’s what the Speaker of the House is

saying.

Read below……………

Nancy Pelosi wants a Windfall Tax on Retirement Income. You aren’t going

to believe this. Madam speaker Nancy Pelosi wants to put a Windfall Tax on

all stock market profits (including Retirement funds, 401Ks and Mutual

Funds!)Alas, it is true - all to help the 12 Million Illegal Immigrants

and other unemployed! Boy, are we in trouble… This woman is frightening.

She quotes..’ We need to work toward the goal of equalizing income in our

country and at the same time limiting the amount the rich

can invest. ‘When asked how these new tax dollars would be spent, she

replied:

‘We need to raise the standard of living of our poor, unemployed and

minorities. For example, we have an estimated 12 million illegal immigrants

in our country who need our help along with millions of unemployed

minorities. Stock market windfall profits taxes could go a long ways to

guarantee these people the standard of living they would like to have as

“Americans”

This is just plain wrong.

Don’t you think the correct solution is to remove the illegal imigrants.

It is an embarrassment to the world to be supposably the greastest country but can  not secure our own borders?

This is the reason  that the millions of illegals were made legal to save embarrasment.

Why should your retirement money pay for something which is illegal?

You are already losing money due to inflation as it does not keep up with interest rates.

Get rid of the 12 million and then there is absolutely no excuse for not having a job,in the event a person lost thier job they could replace it the next day,wouldn,t we have a great country to live in then?

I am also concerned with the illegals for security reasons,if 12 million made it here how many terrorists are here that are just sitting and waiting,if they want to use my money then do it to secure our country!

GET INVOLVED !!!!!!!!!!

Idiot Maggot Towel Head Obama’s Reason For Not  Honoring Our Flag

Hot on the heels of his explanation for why he no longer wears a flag pin,
presidential candidate Senator Barack Obama was forced to explain why he
doesn’t follow protocol when the National Anthem is played.

According to the United States Code, Title 36, Chapter 10, Sec. 171,
During rendition of the national anthem when the flag is displayed, all present except
those in uniform are expected to stand at attention facing the flag with the
right hand over the heart.

“As I’ve said about the flag pin, I don’t want to be perceived as taking sides,”
Obama said. “There are a lot of people in the world to whom the American flag is a symbol of oppression. And the anthem itself conveys a war-like message.
You know, the bombs bursting in air and all. It should be swapped for something less parochial and less bellicose. I like the song ‘I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing.’ If that were our anthem, then I might salute it.”

This man does not respect our symbols of pride and freedom and
respect This man proposes to be the Commander-in-Chief of our Armed
Forces who fight for our flag and our veterans who have fought, died, been maimed, over the last 200+ years? I suspect that he also does not believe in the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag but yet when you see him making a speech on television (like
the recent Philadelphia race speech) he is surrounded by a backdrop of 10 or more American flags! He likes those props! You can assume from all this that he is a fake and a hypocrite.

Something is wrong and frightening here.

AND SOME PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY STILL THINK HE IS THE GREATEST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEIR HEADS?

A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to meet, and have dinner with her parents.

Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time

The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex
before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get
some condoms.

He tells t he pharmacist it’s his first
time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour.

He tells the boy everything there is to know about
condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he’d like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. T he boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl’s parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door.

‘Oh, I’m so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!’
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table
where the girl’s parents are seated.

The boy quickly
offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down.

10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, ‘I had no idea you were this religious.

‘
The boy turns, and whispers back, ‘I had no idea
your father was a pharmacist